I will be away ever since

there's another 13 days ahead. pmr keeps on haunting me. i can't barely sleep. i hate facing with the books. i really really really for god sake i hate it but somehow, come to think of it, it's what decide my future. i had applied for sc boarding school. im going to applied for mrsm after pmr result. im hoping for the best result. i've started doing my revision. i keep on thinking 'bout boarding school. what would life be then ? how am i going to survive ? people keep on saying that boarding school life is much tougher. you have to face serious competition regarding your study. students are very competitive in class. stress is alot more than never. but before i have to face these shits, i have to get over with pmr at the first place. life will never be easy for me for i am still in a learning process. it's hard, i know. but it'll be paid off in the end. there is still a long way to go. mind are getting mature each day. i try to think more critically. the presence of pressure is undeniable. i have to sacrifice everything. after pmr is over, i swear i'll not touch any of my books again ! bahahaha ;D